it has happened before, it will happen again

so. i think i figured out one of the major problems in my life right now.

fucking college. i need to not be in college. i need to be doing work that doesn't have vague benefits, but actual tangible ones: a paycheck, benefits, increased resume.

i'm not going to do anything much more here. i'm going to hone my skills as a theatre artist more (oh god, when did i stop thinking of myself as an actor, and start thinking of myself as a "theatre artist?"), but i'm not going to do anything of any real value. i'm going to write a thesis that won't get me anywhere, because i'm not going to grad school for anything intellectual. or any time soon. so it's going to be a big waste of time and emotion and paper and whatever.

so i need to get my diploma, and get the FUCK out of here.


i think i need to be in the city. but like...what do i do when i get there? i'm gonna need to develop a group of friends, because i don't know how many of my friends will travel in the circles i want to. it sounds silly, but i'm probably also going to take some time off of theatre so i can experience what life is like when you don't have rehearsal. maybe i'll just do one show next year.






i want to just go be a regular gay 20-something. or a regular 20-something period.


whatever the hell that means.